1 Peter 3:4 Printable {gentle and quiet spirit}

Since I am SERIOUSLY slacking in my posts lately, here's something fun to fill in the gap! I don't know about you, but I definitely need this reminder DAILY. I am hanging this up above my desk, but you could also scale it down when you print and just hang a lit'l version on your bathroom mirror, or wherever it will encourage you. :)

Click the link below for a PDF version.

Quiet Spirit Printable


Here's to a gentle and quiet spirit!

why perfect mom syndrome belittles the gospel...

Picture this. Someone hands you a beautifully wrapped present...we're talking Nordstrom's gift-wrapping counter quality here. It's obvious they spent a lot of time making sure every corner was perfect, that no tape was visible, and that the hand crafted ribbon bow was just right. It's plain to see that they spend hours picking out the most aesthetically pleasing combination of wrapping paper and ribbon.

Now imagine opening this gift, and finding the contents of one of those little silver trash cans attached to each stall of a public women's restroom. Yuck. What kind of person would do such a thing? Who would think that slapping a bow on this appalling mess would make somebody want it?

This kind of person would. Each day, I present my own righteous works to King Jesus as if I can somehow contribute to His perfect atonement on the cross. I wrap my filthy (menstrual, actually) rags, filled with self-righteousness and pride, in a cute little bow and haughtily strut this little package up to the throne as if it's something the Holy One needs. How dare I. I have the audacity to do this everyday, several times a day.

When I try to claw my way to the top of that perfect mommy/wife pedestal that I've created, this is what's happening. I am dishonoring Christ's work on the cross. I am slapping the Lord of Lords in the face, telling Him "that's nice, what you did...giving your perfect, sinless life and bearing and becoming all sin, and letting me share in your glory; but I really don't need help with this. This I am amazing at...just watch." How dare I. How dare I push His kindness aside to adorn myself with rags and flaunt my self-proclaimed greatness to the world??

This is a lot to handle, I know. I've been listening to "Since I am So Sick" by Enter the Worship Circle on repeat, and I know it's showing. The thing is, daily I forsake Him. Daily I belittle Him. Hourly I forget Him. And yet, ETERNALLY  He is kind. Eternally He is on the throne. Eternally He is faithful, righteous, loving, merciful, majestic, beautiful. In light of this, why do I keep trying to prove to myself and the rest of the world what a great mom & wife I am? On what scale do we think it will matter that we have clean baseboards, or don't give our kids candy, or homeschool, or clean our houses with vinegar instead of windex, or cook gourmet meals for our families every night? Do these "successes" (as we deem them) have eternal weight? Do these works add to the all encompassing, perfect, sufficient grace of God?

Hear me real quick when I say that there is nothing wrong with having strong beliefs/convictions/opinions or whatever about any of these things. Surely it is beneficial to be a good steward of our bodies, our health, our time, our homes, our precious babies. This is glorifying to God right up to the point where we become prideful in our own abilities, and our motives turn sinful. If I think that eating all organic or homeschooling (the list goes on and on....and I definitely don't eat all organic) makes me better than anyone else, yes, this is pride...and pride is sin. My pride in my own choices, accomplishments, abilities, is what belittles the gospel. The gospel of Jesus Christ does not include my greatness. The gospel frees me of the bondage of trying to prove my greatness. My greatness does not exist....my evil and depravity is covered by God's greatness!

Weary mother, beautiful young woman serving Him single, gentleman who stumbled upon this post, listen to this:

No matter what I do, no matter what choices I make, I am not--CAN NOT BE--good enough. Christ in me is my only hope of glory. Christ in me is my only hope of being a good wife, parent, friend, daughter, sister, employee, whatever He calls me to be. Please, oh please, live and rest in this freedom.

Here's to making much of Christ by boasting in our weakness!

Tiff

holiday humility...

Every year. Every single year, we all stress about the holidays and which side of the family we will be with on which day, which side gets Thanksgiving, which side gets Christmas Eve....do we even go to our family holiday dinners at all this year? If you aren't familiar with this stress, well...this blog post might not be for you, but please feel free to keep reading.

A few years ago (and as recent as last holiday season), my husband and I decided we were going to take a stand and "start our own holiday traditions." We decided we weren't going to be guilted into going to family holiday things...that we'd only go if we wanted to. I almost can't bear to read that as I'm typing it (Know that I just deleted and retyped this several times). The thought of my family reading this--and I know some of you will--just makes me want to cry. I'd like to take the time to publicly apologize for this attitude.

Let me hurry and say something real quick like before a bunch of people stop reading. This concept, in and of itself, is not bad at all. I think it is a wonderful idea to start traditions with your spouse and children...wonderful! I also understand that a lot of people have to travel to be with family over the holidays. Choosing not to cough up the expense to do so...well, that is definitely a choice we would have to make quite frequently if our families lived far away. 

What I am referring to, and attempting to repent of, is the attitude that often goes with these decisions; the attitude I have been guilty of acting with many times. I've shared before that I wrestle daily with not making my husband and children the gods of my life. That being said, as icky as this sounds, I don't want to share them with anyone. I want them to love me the most and the best, I want all of their special memories to include me and my husband....and no one else. ick. I hate admitting that, but in the hope of helping someone else realize the danger of this, I'm powering through! I'm also attempting to repent of being inconvenienced by my parents being amazing grandparents. How dare I?! How dare I have the nerve to be anything less than overwhelmed with thankfulness for their generosity and love?

Don't get me wrong. I'm right there with you, moms who read 7 and books n' blogs like it that talk about how spoiled our kids are. I think we should take steps to prevent this, however, being ungrateful and bossing our parents around is NOT the way to go about it. Dishonoring our parents by ordering them to only get our kids one present? Yep, I've done it, and I'm just going to come out and say it...it's disrespectful and ungrateful. On top of that, remember that your kids are watching you relate to your parents. I know. It's frightening.

If you want to set some kind of limit on the presents (which is a good thing, IMO), I implore you to try and come from a place of humility and respect. This is the kind of thing that requires a discussion, not an punctuation-less text saying "only 1 present for little johnny this year plz." I speak from experience. Yep, daughter of the century, right here.

If you read my post, "who do we think we are?", you might remember my talking about my conviction over not continuing to honor my mother and my in-laws as my adult life progresses. So let me pose the question, am I honoring my parents by secretly wanting to leave them out of my kids' special holiday memories and traditions? Personally (and I think this has to be a personal thing), I feel that I'm not. If I say "thanks for raising me, lending me money, helping me figure out how to be a parent (including at 3 in the morning when I am crying to you saying I can't do it), and trying your best to make the holidays special for me my whole life...but...I think we've got it from here. It's time for us to start "our" traditions now," what message is that sending to not only my children, but siblings and other young parents who are watching these actions?

I don't mean to wag my finger at anyone who makes that tough decision to keep the holidays within your new, precious family unit. It is so precious to have that time alone with your husband and kids! This is a conviction that God has heavily placed on my heart, and I don't have the audacity to believe everyone should follow suit. All I know is, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my mom. My husband wouldn't be here if it wasn't for his parents. Our incredible, breathtaking babies wouldn't be here if it weren't for these precious people. In light of this, I feel that including them in the new traditions we hope to build, and continuing to embrace the established traditions is a very practical way we can honor our parents. Honestly, is it that hard to do your own thing and show up at your family events? I promise, it's not as stressful as you might think!

Lastly, I won't tell you how long I sat and wept a while ago over the thought of my kids not wanting to include me in their holidays after they are grown....it's embarrassing. Let's just say you'd think someone died. I can't expect my kids to honor me into adulthood if I don't set that example; and I hope that--by God's grace--my example might resemble someone who is blessed and privileged  by the opportunity to honor my fantastic parents, someone who doesn't let apathy take over in how they relate to and love on those who made my family possible.

I realize there are some out there who will read this and meet it with bitterness toward parents who they feel failed them. All I can say is that if you've ever seen a holiday movie from the 80s or 90s, you know that the holiday season is prime reconciliation material. Give it a go, I think I will...but that's a story for another time.

Here's to creating a culture of honor in Him,

Tiff

who do we think we are?

Is it just me, or does it seem that in this generation of moms (myself included), we think we know everything and that we are the only generation of moms who really want what is best for our children?

Take the "whole food" phenomenon that has swept the nation in the past few years. I just want to cry sometimes when I hear/see a mom feeling guilty that she isn't doing all natural/organic/vegan/gluten free/sugar free/taste free/fun free diet with her kids. Two thoughts plague me when I see something like this going on.

First, I feel like tracking down all the braggarts who claim that they care more about their kids because they spend $500 a week on food...and I just feel like giving them my two cents. "Your parenting choices do NOT make you better or worse than anyone else. Bragging about how healthy you are is totally tacky and rude...and even though people 'like' your brags posts, I guarantee they are subsequently--if not simultaneously--rolling their eyes. Get over yourself." Disclaimer: Sometimes, I'd be saying this to a mirror...but lately we eat about 99% inorganic food (some of it is even--gaaaasssssp--processed {oh the horror!!!}) ...and guess what...we're all still kickin. 

The end of my disclaimer brings me to my second plaguing thought in these situations. I have to wonder how these kids' grandparents are feeling about how they raised these bragging moms and dads....because I'd wager that roughly 84% of them were not raised on raw milk or kale salads or chia seed smoothies.

My husband and I were both raised by single moms...who are amazing women, by the way. We both feel that our moms did a great job of teaching us balance. We ate lots of filling, well balanced, home cooked meals AND fast food; we ate raisin bran AND cinnamon toast crunch; we ate white bread AND wheat bread. We were served and loved by wonderful mothers who provided nourishment for us from the time they were pregnant with us, to...well, they still cook for us frequently!

Would I be obeying the commandment ("the first commandment with a promise" in the words of the apostle Paul) to Honor my mother by showing her that not only am I not thankful and pleased with how she raised me; but also,having the audacity to imply that I care more about my children than she cared about me....because the ONLY sweetener my kids ingest is organic honey?? (What the heck is that, anyway? How do they tell which bees are organic?) WHO DO WE THINK WE ARE?!

Take a moment today, and give yourself--and the woman who raised you--some grace. Aren't we all given the same impossible love for our children? Don't we all want to do right by them, and do what we believe is best? Isn't it okay if we all have different ideas as to what that looks like? I'm saying this to myself first. Self...next time, before you rush to post something that's a little braggy, consider whether or not I'm honoring my own mother and how she raised me; then consider whether or not this is going to make someone else feel like they aren't measuring up to the virtual world they see.

Here's to breathing encouragement upon one another as we await our precious bridegroom!

Tiff

cool new (and inexpensive) mommy products!

My children and I consider going to wal-mart a very exciting outing. Since we are a one car family at the moment (my hubby is building a hot rod, but I don't really count that as a second family car), you can bet that anytime the kids and I have the car, we'll end up walking around at wal-mart just to get out of the house. That being said, we did that this afternoon. I ended up having to nurse the baby while we were walking around, so we decided to hang out in the baby section. Go figure. Anyway, I came across some products that I thought were pretty amazing, so I thought I'd share them.

Munchkin Easy Squeezy Spoon - $5.76 

I will definitely be using this when little ham starts solids! Perfect for feeding solids while out and about...especially homemade baby food!

BooginHead Reusable Food Pouch - $7.96

I love this! I love those baby food pouches, and now there's a reusable option...again perfect for homemade baby food!

Parent's Choice Stack & Seal Cups - I think these were $1.88 but I can't remember!

I was going to buy these and spaced out, but I'll definitely get them next time. I love that they stack, so I'm not digging through the diaper bag for 3-4 different snack cups for my kids...I can just find the nice tall stack of them!

Playtex SmartStand Universal Lid Holder - $4.98

Oh my goodness. I think I have literally cried because I couldn't find any matching sippy cup & lid combinations before. Nuff said. 

Ziploc Spill Proof Sippy Cups (with twist on lids) - $4.97

These don't have valves, just like those little "take & toss" cups (which I swear by), so I don't know how spill proof they actually are, but I love the twist on lid aspect!

I hope this is helpful! I can't wait to try out some of these products. 

Until next time,

Tiff